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Friday, 23 April 2010

Clash of the Titans

Hey guys - I've just RE-IMAGINED something! It was a potato but I've re-imagined it as a sausage.

Re-imagining is easy - just think of something that already exisits and concentrate very hard on pretending it's something slightly different. Try it with a potato. See how much better it is now?

That's because potatoes were rubbish to begin with.

The word 're-imagining' makes most film fans want to tear out their eyeballs as they watch their childhood memories rehashed into a CGI mess starring an inappropriately cast Nic Cage. But the real problem isn’t really remaking films, it’s remaking - or re-imagining - them badly.

From The Wicker Man and Planet of Apes to Get Carter and Alfie, most remakes of the last decade took great movies and threw up on them. The real solution for studios is to only remake bad movies - pick a deeply flawed but fondly remembered cult classic with dodgy acting and outdated special effects.

Step forward 1981 fantasy epic Clash of the Titans.

The film, based on the hero Perseus from Greek myth, was a sizable hit when originally released, but has since been relegated to the occasional Sunday afternoon repeat on Channel Five.

It has its charms, but leaves plenty of room for improvement.

Eg. Harry Hamlin’s pan-faced portrayal of dimwit Perseus, which left most viewers thinking he’d already been turned to stone by the Medusa.

And then there's his mechanical friend Bubo the owl - the second most univerally hated movie sidekick of all time. In fact, they could just remake the whole film EXACTLY the same, except get rid of that owl and it would be fine. I will try to find a picture of Bubo to insert here.

Look at his metal owl face.

So you should give Clash of the Titans 2010 a chance. (I won't be, I can't be bothered.)

Remember the legend of Perseus is such a good one, the Greeks have been telling it for 3000 years already. So once more won't hurt. Probably. Let’s just hope they've left out the robot owl this time round.

Clash of the Titans 2010, directed by Louis Leterrier and starring Sam Worthington, is in cinemas now.