X FACTOR WEEK FOUR: HALLOWEEN

Poor Storm 'Lee Gardner' Lee. Imagine him sitting at home, quietly weeping while watching the remaining X Factor contestants on stage singing with none other than his hero Bon Jovi.

I would think his bitterness levels rocketed through the bitterness scale that night.

Storm is offically the UK's bitterest most deluded man. Let's follow his journey from improvorished L.A. singer-songwriter to gay burglar through his own words...


8th Sept
"Cheryl Cole I love you. I live for you. When I started singing and I locked eyes on you, you got me. I know you did because you know what it feels like. So Cheryl I love you, you have no idea."
BITTERNESS LEVEL: COMPLETELY UN-BITTER
DELUSION LEVEL: BUBBLING UNDER


8th Oct
"I have a special connection to everyone who has been on the show"
BITTERNESS LEVEL: LOW


14th Oct
"Duetting with Lady GagGa would be amazing, I auditioned to be a backing singer for her tour but she wanted girls. I think she’s a little bit of a soulmate.'
DELUSION LEVEL: RISING

18th Oct
"If Brian May called me up for Queen and said that they had a gig coming up, I would be up for trying out."
DELUSION LEVEL: EXTERMEMLY HIGH

18th Oct
"In the future I will be in control of my artistic presentation and things like that. Until now I have been at the whim of Louis Walsh who, to be honest, is a bit out of touch. It's really difficult when you are working with someone like that to be exciting, relevant and modern. You are pushing up against a mountain."
BITTERNESS LEVEL: VERY BITTER


BONUS STORM X FACT! Storm sang backing vocals on Meatloaf's It's All Coming Back to Me Now

20th Oct
"I'm the most versatile singer out of all of the contestants. That’s not me being arrogant but I realized early on that it's not a singing show, it's a popularity competition. I feel really relieved to be out, actually. Right from the start I was pushing against a lot of factors that were really against me, and I knew, quite early on, that I was probably a bit too creative for the show, a bit too polished and too self-realized."
BITTERNESS LEVEL: GETTING TOO BITTER TO SURVIVE

19th Oct
"Louis made me look like Gary Glitter. He favoured Mary because they're both Irish and a similar age"
BITTERNESS LEVEL: WARNING WARNING FAR TOO BITTER

19th Oct
"Louis didn't say anything to me after the show. I had a really amazing talk with Simon, he said he was really sorry to see me go. I'm a songwriter, that's how I plan to make serious money. I said, 'Please let me work with you', and he was up for it."
DELUSION LEVEL: CRITICAL

Oct 26
I feel Katie and Cher are there just to be famous, not to become singers – and I wish I hadn’t spent so much time with Katie."
BITTERNESS LEVEL: LIKE A BITTER LEMON

31st Oct
"I can't see Mary really connecting with the public. She's like my mum. I felt very alone and no one understood my uniqueness. Louis didn't how to handle it."
DELUSION LEVEL: COMPELTELY DELUDED


2nd Nov
"Interestingly, I spent more time with Cheryl and Simon than Louis, my glorious leader.
Cheryl got me, was very into me, loved my shoes and my style."

ACTUAL CONVERSATION:
Storm: 'Hey Cheryl, did you love my performance of Born To Run, with the motorbike and everything?'
Cheryl: 'Um, I like your shoes?'